5/23/11 – My animals are all against me.
I swear all of my animals intentionally sit around and think of ways to annoy me. I’m not sure why they do it. They live a cushy life, but they are bent on driving me nuts daily. What is so crazy is that they have the ability to make me feel that I am somehow abusing them as they are annoying me. In the moment I am beyond frustrated but as soon as I look that way with my eyes narrowed they give me “the look”. All of a sudden I feel horrible. They are angels. What’s wrong with me? Why do I fall victim to their charms so easily? I think I read too much into their facial expressions.
Buster is the boxer who perpetually looks sad or high, depending on the pollen count. He constantly looks like he has been mistreated. As soon as I yell his name he puts on his sad face and makes me feel horrible for yelling. Percy, oh Percy, he is adorable and has this cute Yorkie face that always looks back at you saying “I’m adorable!” No matter what he does (and believe me he does a lot to be so little) he looks at me and I melt. I’m a sucker. Stella is a typical cat. She makes me nervous, like she will pounce on me at any moment and make me regret getting on to her. I can’t compete with all those looks. It’s too much.
Regardless of the faces I get, they drive me nuts in the morning. Percy must have ADHD. He wakes up at the crack of dawn and starts running around the house. He is like a windup toy that is cranked too tight. He runs laps around the bedroom crashing into the bed as he tries desperately to make those extra 8” that he lacks (like he could make it anyway). He’s persistent, gotta give him that. He keeps doing it over and over and over. Bam! Hit the bed. Bam! Hit the bed. He just keeps comin’. He would make a great X-Games dog. He then starts chasing Stella around the house growling as he goes. Percy!
Buster is more methodical in his annoying behavior. Buster is a firm believer in sleeping in – a dog after my own heart. Just when I’m starting to appreciate Buster and think that he is the only animal who really cares about me he starts his old man noise. I call it the old man noise since he has those floppy jaws and sounds like he’s a 100 and is having trouble chewing his food. Smack, smack, smack. Lick, lick, lick. Dude! Stop! How can an animal possibly be that loud? After a while Percy’s persistence finally drags Buster out of bed. Buster can’t just hang out in the house. He has to stand on my side of the bed and stare at me. His eyes are bed level. It is creepy waking up knowing something is staring at you, especially when that thing isn’t blinking.
After I am finally fed up with the dogs and scoot them outside to do their business Stella creeps in to claim her spot. Stella generally doesn’t annoy me other than throwing her tail in my face on occasion. Why do cats do that? To show you that they’re the boss? Stella is a licker like Buster. I realize that cats are cleaning themselves when they lick (unlike Buster spreading the slobber), but does she really have to do that in front of me? I am fairly certain that I go in the bathroom to shower, why does she feel that she should shower in front of me? I don’t want to see or hear that. With Buster I just yell his name and he stops his noise making, but Stella? Not gonna fly. I yell her name and she just stares at me and resumes the cleaning ritual. Who’s the boss? Apparently not me.
Animals! I live in a house with a bunch of animals, and not the cute cuddly kind but the kind that drive you crazy. But, I love ‘em!
Today I’m feeling better than yesterday but not fully better. Tomorrow I hope to be back to my normal good week. If I could have anything to eat I would love a watermelon! Watermelon signifies summer and I am ready for summer. My song of the day is for my awesome, supportive husband who I would definitely go insane during all this without - “Teenage Dream” from the Glee soundtrack.
Night y’all!
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