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| Ungliest cake I've ever seen, but I did make it. War Eagle! |
7/5/11 – I feel bad. I have seriously neglected my blog. My excuse is that (1) I felt horrible from chemo last week and (2) I went out of town again (4th of July). Poor excuses, right? Oh, well. I will attempt to make amends thanks to my insomnia.
I left off on the Thursday before the wedding. Let the story continue… As you may recall Mrs. Janet, Ashley, and I arrived home somewhere around the 12:00 AM hour Thursday night running on fumes and rolls from Logan’s. Friday morning Ashley and I woke up early, threw some bummy clothes on, and headed to the church. (This is where the real action begins.) We arrived at the church and started unloading the truck. We laid out the plan for how the reception area should be set up. Ashley and I both picked our area to work and started setting up the area. Tables were moving, chairs were sliding everywhere, we were blasting it out. Nikki (one of Ashley’s friends) showed up and started helping. The flowers were running late so we wanted to get as much accomplished as possible to make time to focus on the flowers once they showed up.
About an hour into it the guys (Todd and Jason) showed up. One might be wondering why the guys didn’t come from the start, but don’t hate. Ashley and I had wisely dispatched the guys to find a Hardee’s and pick up gravy biscuits to fuel our day. The guys and Mrs. Janet showed up at the same time and we took a much needed breakfast break. I was starting to fade early and the food helped perk me up. After our meal we all got to work. The guys had to set up the sanctuary area and move a lot of equipment and chairs. Ashley and Nikki continued with the set up. Mrs. Janet and I started making isle marker bows. We all worked simultaneously and knocked it out. Of course after we finished our tasks there were more to do. Polish the silver servers, clean the mirror box, set out the bowls and floating candles, iron the table cloths (Nikki is my hero. I don’t iron and she did it all.), organize the kitchen area… I happen to have a mild/serious case of OCD – it’s a blessing and curse – so I appointed myself as the one to make sure all the tables were spaced the same and all the table cloths hung exactly the same, no exceptions. Those table cloths were perfection.
As the day wore on I became more and more anxious about making the groom’s cake. They needed me to help at the church but I needed to start my cake. I wanted to wait until the flowers arrived because the guys needed to help unload the flowers but they were going to run to Wal-Mart with me – yeah, I hadn’t bought my ingredients yet – and then drive me to house. Where were those flowers? Earlier in the day Ashley received a call from the person who was supposed to pick them up and the flower store had completely forgotten her order. Ashley had to dictate over the phone which flowers she was supposed to get. Around 1:45-ish the flowers showed up. The guys unloaded the flowers and we scuttled out the door to Wal-Mart. We split the list of items between cake supplies and random things that we still needed for the wedding. I booked it to the grocery isle and picked up my cake supplies and items for the punch. I only had one minor breakdown on the juice isle when I couldn’t find white grape juice and then mistakenly thought an old guy was either Jason or Todd and started complaining about how I couldn’t find the juice. After recovering from my slight embarrassment – it was only slight because I was too tired and frazzled to actually become fully embarrassed at that point – I finally found the juice and headed out to find Todd and Jason. I’m unsure why I was the one who had to find them because I was the one who had the most items on my list. I believe this points to women’s superiority at multitasking and the fact that we can have a breakdown and recover at an alarming rate. Yes, we know we are all crazy but at least we are a high functioning part of society. I helped Jason choose which card to pick for Ashley and seriously contemplated buying an energy drink – why? Why didn’t I buy that energy drink? – before we checked out. There was a moment when I almost punched the lady checking us out in the face – yes, I was to that level of hysteria. Another employee came up to her and started talking about how some other person was slacking and not doing their job and our check out person kept talking to her and discussing how she needed to take her break all the while she was not doing her job. What job was that? Checking out my stinkin’ groceries. There was a brief moment when I looked at Todd and all he said was “don’t”. Enough said. That lady was lucky.
We made a brief stop at McDonalds to get me a cheeseburger to contain my rage and headed back to the church to drop off the punch and other wedding items. The guys and I then headed to the house to make the cake. It was 3:00 when we arrived at the house and we had to be at the rehearsal at 6:00 and were then supposed to go out to eat in Birmingham. Stressed. Stressed. Stressed. I whipped up the cake ingredients with the guys help and shoved the batter into the oven. Yes, Jason helped make his own groom’s cake. Todd was my runner. I blew out Ashley’s hand mixer making my first (first) batch of buttercream. Todd would run up to his parent’s house and get things I had forgotten or things I needed to borrow (like Mrs. Janet’s mixer). Around 4:00 the guys received a call that they need to go pick up some ferns that we were borrowing for the wedding because they were too big and the pots were too heavy for Ashley and Carley (Ashley’s friend and other bridesmaid) to lift. The guys needed to leave at 4:30 to get them to the church. There was no way I could leave with the guys as I had originally planned. I was only at the beginnings of my cake baking. The guys headed out and I was left alone to work. Mr. Berle had gotten home from work so he came down to Ashley’s house to help me and keep me company. I made my batch of buttercream and then wrapped my cake base with aluminum foil to look better and then started stacking my cooled cake.
The cake was dark chocolate with extra cocoa and chocolate morsels. Jason likes peanut butter and chocolate so I made a peanut butter fudge cake. I laid the first layer down and then covered it with a fresh jar of creamy Jiff. I then spread a layer of chocolate buttercream on top of the peanut butter and placed the second and final cake layer on top. It was at that point that I remembered that I had no clue what the time was. I asked Mr. Berle and he said 5:00. Holy crap! We needed to leave in 30 minutes and I was disgusting. I quickly showered and got ready and we headed out the door in the nick of time.
We made it to the church and started the rehearsal. Everything went smoothly. As we walked through everything I was already calculating what all I still had to do. Finish icing the cake, smooth the cake (hard), roll out the fondant for the Alabama A and then draw and cut it out (side note: I had never worked with fondant before.), then add the edge detail and side detail, and line the A with white buttercream to stand out. I don’t know if any of you have ever made a cake like this before but that is a lot and takes a lot of time. I started to think about how long dinner would take – hour drive to Birmingham, then dinner, then another hour drive home. I would then be forced to do all the cake items once I got home from that and I was already worn out and my eye was starting to twitch. I simply couldn’t go to dinner. That was it. I hated to miss the dinner but I just couldn’t go, not if I wanted the cake to look good and get to bed sometime before 4:00AM. I told Todd and apologized to Ashley and Jason. I really wanted to be there. Mr. Berle signed on to stay with me and be my personal assistant.
Once the rehearsal was finished Mr. Berle and I headed to the house. We made a quick stop for gas and I made the wise judgment that I needed beer. Only alcohol could fix this predicament – my nerves, that is. We made it to the house and I got to work. Mr. Berle made me coffee (yes, that’s right coffee and beer, weird I know but it worked) and then made us both 2 tomato sandwiches. I love, love tomato sandwiches. I wasn’t missing Japanese at all. I started to ice the cake and realized that I needed another batch of buttercream. I made my second batch and continued to ice the cake. I had made the icing thick because I wanted it to stick well and be easier to smooth, unfortunately this meant that I ran out of icing yet a third time. I made my third batch of chocolate butter cream and finished icing the cake. I dreaded smoothing it. I let the cake sit and focused on the A. I had dyed the fondant earlier in the day only to wind up with red hands. I looked slightly like a killer – red hands and a crazed look in my eye from being so worn out. Mr. Berle and I rolled the fondant out (only having to start over once) and then I stenciled the A into the fondant and cut it out with a knife. I let the fondant sit and get harder and focused back on the cake. It was the moment of truth, the time to smooth the icing. Smoothing icing has always been my nemesis. It is hard to do and very hard to make it all look uniform. I used my knife under hot water technique and blasted it out. I don’t know if God cares about cakes, but He was definitely with me when I was smoothing that cake. I was able to smooth the cake on my first try. I was beginning to feel hopeful. It was now time for the A. Mr. Berle and I manned our spatulas and placed the A directly in the center of the cake. The hard part was over. I still had a lot left but they were easy decorating things.
I added the beading around the edges. I was afraid that I would run out of buttercream again but I was able to make it last. I then added the white around the A to make it stand out (it was ok, but didn’t look like I had envisioned.) I then remembered that I was supposed to have a side cross hatch detail. “Mr. Berle! I need a toothpick.” He searched for a toothpick and could only find one of those toothpick flosser things. That would have to do. I used the toothpick flosser and added the side cross hatch detail. It looked cool. The cake was done. We placed it into the fridge and I laid down on the couch. Aaahhh…. The longer I sat on that couch the more unhappy I became thinking about the white around the A. It just didn’t look right. My cake was going to be in a church with people who know good food and with a professional wedding cake. I began to feel sick because I knew the white should look better. My inner monolog was something like this - “But it’s 10:00. I’ve worked on this cake 4 ½ hours. I’m tired.” “No, good Bamberg. You can do better.” Mr. Berle had cleaned the kitchen and started to nap on the loveseat. I stood up and announced, “I’ve got to fix the white. I have to make another batch of buttercream.” I had to make another (5th) batch of buttercream because I was out of icing and had to have white, not chocolate buttercream. I whipped up my final batch and decided on how to fix the cake. A star tip. A star tip is always my best friend. I added the additional lining to the A and Mr. Berle and I assessed my work. Mr. Berle said “I thought you were crazy at first but that really made the A stand out.” Success. I was happy and finally satisfied with my cake. Done. It was then 10:45 and I had worked 5 hours and 15 minutes on the cake. It was awesome and it was finished. I crashed on the couch.
A few minutes later Todd, Ashley, Jason, and Carley all showed up back from the dinner. It was definitely a good idea that I skipped out. Todd had brought me a sushi roll so I didn’t fully miss out on Japanese. It was delicious. Time to go to bed. Friday was finally over.
That concludes the Friday before the wedding. Only one day left….
If I could have anything to eat I would like a pickle. My song of the day for that Friday would have been “Nothing to Lose” by Billy Talent.
Night y’all!
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